There are times in our lives when we feel like everything is falling to pieces. We feel like all of the things that can go wrong do indeed go wrong.
For some of us, it is when our health is failing. For others, it is when your child or children are facing great struggles. And sometimes it is when your career or love life is falling apart. It doesn't matter which one it is or if it is several of them at one time, life itself can be challenging.
So, what do you do when your life is falling apart? My first suggestion is that you take a step back and look at your life as a whole. Ask yourself these questions, are you healthy, are your children safe? Do you have a supportive partner or friend? Are you living in a safe, comfortable home? And do you have enough money to eat? If you can answer yes to one, two, or all of these questions, you are doing just fine.
I don't believe it is pollyannish to feel good when your basic needs are being met, and you're in good health. In my opinion, this gives you a good base from which to start looking at your problems. What are your perceptions, and what are these situations trying to tell you?
For some of us, it is when our health is failing. For others, it is when your child or children are facing great struggles. And sometimes it is when your career or love life is falling apart. It doesn't matter which one it is or if it is several of them at one time, life itself can be challenging.
So, what do you do when your life is falling apart? My first suggestion is that you take a step back and look at your life as a whole. Ask yourself these questions, are you healthy, are your children safe? Do you have a supportive partner or friend? Are you living in a safe, comfortable home? And do you have enough money to eat? If you can answer yes to one, two, or all of these questions, you are doing just fine.
I don't believe it is pollyannish to feel good when your basic needs are being met, and you're in good health. In my opinion, this gives you a good base from which to start looking at your problems. What are your perceptions, and what are these situations trying to tell you?
Let's start with a couple of "falling apart quotes" I found that may shine a light on what I'm thinking. The first quote is: "Sometimes when things are falling apart they may be falling into place."
Here is the second quote: "It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not." And finally: "The endings won't end you."
As you can see by some of these quotes, you are not alone in the world. You have the same experiences as your peers, only this is much more personal. Now is the time to "be" with this information you are receiving. How does it feel inside of you? If it is painful, let it come in and recognize it. That feeling has been trying to get your attention for a long time, and you have kept it at bay. That feeling has manifested over time, and now you can't ignore it. You can judge it if you want, but that still doesn't make it go away. Think of the quote above, "the endings won't end you." This pain may be very unpleasant, but it will not end you. So, invite it in and just be with it. You don't need to know why it is there. You don't need to strategize why you need to be with it. Just take time with it, and don't be afraid of it.
So many times in life, I have tried to mask my pain. I could do it with medicine, alcohol, or any other distraction (hello NFL), but know I take the information in and "be" with it the best that I can. I don't want to miss any more time with my feelings and emotions. I don't want to delay my experiences anymore. And, I can share with you that they have always helped me in the next space in my life. I don't always know how or why things happen to me, but they just do.
So many times in life, I have tried to mask my pain. I could do it with medicine, alcohol, or any other distraction (hello NFL), but know I take the information in and "be" with it the best that I can. I don't want to miss any more time with my feelings and emotions. I don't want to delay my experiences anymore. And, I can share with you that they have always helped me in the next space in my life. I don't always know how or why things happen to me, but they just do.
As I close this blog, I want to remind you that even though you may feel that everything is going wrong, I want you to stop and feel what it is that you think is going wrong.
Don't start blaming or judging the situation, just think about the sensation you are having and see if it is trying to get your attention. Ask yourself, have I ignored this feeling before? Is this feeling trying to tell me something? You may be surprised at the answers you get back.